So no one warned me that having a child would change the friendships I have. I feel like its definitely something that got looked over in pregnancy manuals just like the trauma of your first poo after childbirth (seems like common sense but when your focused on how a head will make it out your pussay you can’t really think much past that).
Anyway I digress…
The friendships you once had may change! In my case, since Eliyah’s birth, I’ve grown apart from some of my oldest friends, grown even closer to others and made a couple of new friends that have kids too and that I’d now consider my besties. The truth is when you have a child/ children especially when they’re young your time is limited because you have to keep another human or humans alive, stimulated and nurtured. It’s time consuming, your focus has to shift and your priorities change. Unfortunately not everyone in your life will understand this or know how to deal with the change which inevitably means you’ll drift apart. However other friendships will flourish and for me the support, love and understanding I get from these relationships have given me strength during the hardest days and have been beside me to celebrate even the days I manage to make it out the door and show up for a lunch date albeit slightly late.
This pregnancy it just so happens that one of the friends I made during Eliyah’s journey into the world is also pregnant with her second! We’re only 6 weeks apart and we’re both having boys! We had already become seriously close before this happened but gestating at the same time has really taken our friendship to new levels.
Pregnancy can be lonely!! Suddenly you can’t drink, smoke or do whatever you do. You’re too tired to go out most of the time, your hormones are all over the place and your body changes overnight.
All you want to do is scream NOBODY UNDERSTANDS!!!!!!!!!
That’s how I felt during my first pregnancy anyway and google assured me thats how many others felt to. BUT when you have a friend going through it with you it’s like having a virtual MUMSNET all the time.
We’ve napped together, gone to hospital appointments together, bought our huge Tena Lady pants and nipple pads together and even compared discharge with one another (TMI I know but it is what it is). I’ve seen her practically everyday this last year, we look after each others kids, stayed at each others family homes in the country and bought matching baby clothes. My son, Eliyah, is obsessed with her daughter Kiki and calls out for her in his sleep sometimes. The love is real.
Honestly the best thing about being pregnant this time round has been having Sophie doing it with me. It’s literally been pure fire banter the whole way through and I’m super thankful to have had this experience especially during a pregnancy without a partner. THANKS SOPH xxxxxx
And now our team goes from 2 to 5…